Finding words of gratitude
One of my valued clients, Dan, shared a beautiful story of transformation with me. Here is a little glimpse of what it looks like working with me!
“After a seemingly wonderful thirty years of a successful career, many friends, and most importantly a healthy and loving family I found myself in a Perfect Storm of chaos that unraveled me. My life completely fell off track and I was filled with despair and darkness. I always considered myself “aware and introspective” and really appreciated the many wonderful years I had but when a series of events all happened at the same time, I was no longer able to manage myself as I had been for years and I was done.
I was turning 51 years old when all those wonderful things ended. Working and managing a new venture that ultimately failed, a dramatic loss of income with the company I worked for close to 30 years, and the end of a 25-year marriage that while was mostly peaceful and loving, had me always searching for real love and happiness. I always believed in therapy and continued going over the years even when things were going well. I wanted to always grow and understand. I realize now that I was spending more time venting than truly understanding how and why I was who I am and why I do or did what I do.
When things began to deteriorate, I realized I need to find a new method to manage the chaos that was beginning as well as prepare myself for what I knew would be considerably more difficult times ahead. So, is it just luck or did the stars align just right when I began a coaching relationship with Phyllis. As a Coach she recognized immediately that before we could begin, I needed to feel safe and comfortable in order to open honestly and vulnerably. She allowed me to tell my story, often just venting in a need to let the pain out. Many of our scheduled times ran long and it meant so much to me that Phyllis recognized when I was overwhelmed or when we were making progress and needed to continue. There were many times that we spoke two to three times a week. I always felt her genuine empathy and interest in my wellbeing. It has always been extremely valuable to me trusting that she will always be there for me.
It was then that I was ready and able to truly listen, and Phyllis was able to really use her knowledge and experience and begin coaching me. We began extracting the answers and directions that she knew I had within me. She taught me the power of listening and especially listening to myself. The more we spoke the more I recognized that Phyllis was not giving me advice but simply “coaching” me to embrace the truth that was within me. One of the most powerful moments for me was when Phyllis encouraged me to begin forgiving myself. To put the darkness and guilt behind me and begin to rebuild my self-esteem. It was one of the most powerful moments for me to accept and embrace. Most importantly it allowed me to move forward with acceptance, awareness, and empathy.
Today with over a year of coaching and much of the chaos behind me I consider myself extremely fortunate to have had Phyllis by my side. She helped me develop the tools necessary to once again trust myself and find those answers within me. We speak once a week or a few times a month and engage in great introspection and direction. Phyllis simply saved my life! Or perhaps she taught me how to save my own life! Full disclosure……Phyllis is my Aunt.